Experiencing Newfound Freedom

In April 2011 I typed this but just now got the nerve to post it.

***I am going to start this with a "non-disclaimer." People who know me, know that I speak up for what I believe in when I feel it's necessary. I'm always learning how love, mercy, and grace should be in what I share. This is a "non-disclaimer" because I AM taking full responsibility of what I am sharing, however, I do acknowledge that some may disagree and that's totally okay. Because this is my blog and because my experience has been so profound in my life, I wanted to share it. We don't hear about stuff like this too much and I am not ashamed of the Gospel and its impact on my life. :) Enjoy! Or don't, whatever suits you. :)***

I was born in the US. Born into freedom. I have never known a life where I was not free to say and do whatever I wanted.

Because I was born into this freedom, I forget about it. I don't think I often understand the sacrifices that took and are taking place for my freedom. I think many of my compadres and peers in the US are much the same way. I don't understand what it is like to be "set free" from another country's ruling and authority. I only understand what it is to "be free". Make sense?

BUT after choosing to follow Christ, I have experienced what it means to be SET free.

I have tried to fight for my freedom from one particular sin for well over a decade of my life. I have relied on Scripture, praise, devotional time, friends, family...all to no stinkin' avail! I began to question, "Where is the power of God in my life?"

But I had a week where a few people committed to praying for me for the entire week. During that week, I felt the Lord's guidance to confession, forgiveness of myself and others, refusing to judge others any longer...and what took place was basically a cleansing/purification process directed by and before the Lord.

Now I have spent time confessing sins before, but this time, I didn't sit down and make a list of sins and cross them off as I went along. Instead, I waited on the Lord to bring to mind anything I needed to confess and to be quite honest, it was like my spirit vomited! Forgive me. I know the word is a strong one but let's be real, "sin" isn't just a little 'step off the path'. Sin is a leap into slavery. In John 8:34 Jesus said, "Everyone who sins is a slave to sin." In Romans we're told that the one we obey is to whom we are enslaved and if it is sin we're enslaved to, well, that leads to death.

Also, we know that God cannot stand sin. It is contrary to every facet of His Being. I have prayed the the Lord would fill my life and faith with Himself, that His Holy Spirit would come and fill myself, the ministry He has called me into and every area of my life I could think of at the time.

And if Light is to enter a place, darkness MUST go. Therefore, the Lord brought out many things that I needed to confess. As they came to mind, I acted in every way I knew how to confess, to see how God sees that action/word/thought and agree with Him, move forward in a way that was pleasing to Him and thank Him for His certain forgiveness (1 John 1:9). I spent a week doing this....a week...a WEEK! That's a lot of junk. And I continue to do this each day (so maybe I won't have to dedicate another whole WEEK to it later :).

But as the Lord showed me what I needed to be rid of, one thing in particular rocked my world. See I may not know what it means to be enslaved to another person. But I KNOW what it means to be enslaved to sin. I know how it is to fight with everything in me but when the enemy just pointed his finger, I would bow.

At this point many may disagree with me. Maybe I'll disagree with me later but at the moment, I can only share my experience.

As a child I opened the door to a world I did not believe in and had no idea of its power. I allowed the Enemy a foothold to which he would strengthen himself year after year, sin after sin, until I was so bound by him in an area of my life that the entirety of life itself seemed pointless.

Yes, Christ was my Savior. I was seeking Him. I was growing in knowledge and in faith. But some areas of my life I felt helpless. I knew there was freedom in Christ but in these areas where I felt helpless, I knew I was a slave to the sin. It seemed like the bondage in one area of my life outweighed the freedom in all of the rest and it definitely interfered with my relationship with my King. I didn't understand it because I have heard story after story of how people who smoked or drank or whatever stopped the instant they chose Christ. So why was my case different?

Finally I reached a point where I understood, that Christ's death HAD conquered sin and it was MY responsibility and privilege to renounce the Enemy's hold on my life. I have begun to understand that the authority that Christ was given, He passed on to those who choose Him. As followers of Christ, we have the authority, through the Helper, to be free from sin, to resist the Enemy...and it was my responsibility to shut the door to evil that I had opened, even if unknowingly, as a child. I believe that it was the oppression from the Enemy (that I unknowingly allowed) that kept me in sin.

No one told me this. I didn't read a book on "How to be free from sin." I just sat in my little fifth wheel trailer and did my best to follow the Lord's direction. I knew that I wanted to know God more. I knew that I wanted His Spirit to guide and direct. Through prayer and His word, I knew I needed to rid my life of some things through confession. As I mentioned, I allowed the Lord to lead me through this, rather than trying to figure it out myself. And as He did, and I obeyed (even if it seemed a bit different than what I was used to), He was faithful in forgiving my sins and PURIFYING me of all unrighteousness. And...

Jesus may have been reading this for those present at the time, but I believe He fulfilled the prophecy for me too:

"The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because He has appointed Me to preach Good News to the poor. He has sent Me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind. To release the oppressed, to proclam the year of the Lord's favor." Luke 4:17-19

I cannot express to anyone the feeling of freedom. I cannot express what I have been through for the last 'umpteen' years trying to free myself apart from the power of God (not the knowledge of God, not the word of God but the actual power of God). I always heard the scripture from Matthew 11 "for my yoke is easy and my burden is light" but having something sooooooo heavy in my life made me skeptical about that passage. It's like carrying around 100 lbs of baggage. No matter what task I have ahead of me, its going to be more difficult because of the extra junk. But when the baggage is removed, because I've carried the weight around for so long, even the difficult tasks seem easy.

His yoke is easy and it is light. Not because I say so and not even because I've experienced it but because He said so and because its true. His yoke is easy and His burden is light and it helps to not be a slave to any sin or oppressed by any principality of this world.

There are so many ways that we are oppressed and held captive that we may not even know. Through this world and our flesh the Enemy grabs at us looking for a place to hang on and drag us down with him.

For those who have read this and are skeptical, remember that it is only my account of my own experience. I have been vague and left out details because I am not trying to convince anyone of anything. I am only attempting to share my own account because few have shared any such encounter with me.

We should not forget that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

It's difficult to remember that at times when we are so busy investing in the things of this world. Don't let your daily prayer time with the Lord suffer. Don't let the busyness of life crowd out your Jesus time. Invest in eternity daily. After all, its the only lasting investment.